Monthly Archives: June 2016

Dare I call this Season Finale‘explosive’? So much happened in this episode I’m still trying to process it. I even watched it twice last night and it’s still overwhelming. Season Six has certainly been a season of giving the fans what they want; Jon Snow’s resurrection, Dany’s victory over the Dothrakis, Arya offing The Waif and leaving the House of Black and White, the Battle of The Bastards and Sansa coming into her own and getting her revenge on Ramsey Bolton. Revenge has been a big part of this season and its tenth and final episode is loaded with it. Many more died than I or anyone else predicted. I am in mourning for one of those lost.

As for the others, it was just their time.

Kings Landing

The episode begins with an incredible sequence. We all suspected that Cersei’s plan was to use the wildfire that The Mad King had placed beneath the city to destroy her enemies gathered at The Sept of Baelor but not how she would pull it off. Apparently, ‘little birds’ can be quite treacherous. It played like the end of a Godfather film. “Michael Corleone, do you reject Satan?” Michael says he does but kills all his enemies anyway. Cersei doesn’t even use that pretense. She has a new outfit made for the occasion. Let’s call it her ‘Evil Queen’ battle dress. She sips wine as she looks out her window in The Red Keep, The Sept of Baelor in plain view. She has The Mountain prevent Tommen from going to the trial. She has Qyburn lead Maester Pycelle into a small room where his little birds draw big knives and mercilessly stab him to death. How many sweets did he need to give them for this dirty deed? At least Pycelle had one last spin in the sheets before he died.

Loras confesses to everything and gives over his life to the Faith of The Seven. They carve the mark of The Seven into his forehead. Margaery is upset about this but The High Sparrow assures her that once Cersei’s trial is over that Loras will be free to go. Margaery knows something’s wrong when Cersei and Tommen fail to appear. She urges everyone to leave but those idiot Faith Militant won’t allow it. Lancel follows another ‘little bird’ into the catacombs and is stabbed in the leg. He is powerless to stop what is coming. The whole place goes up in green smoke! I mean everyone in the Sept is vaporized! That means sweet, beautiful Margaery is gone. She is the loss I mourn. I mean, come on! Why? Bloody hell!

Poor Tommen can only watch from The Red Keep as his beloved is killed and everyone else, The High Sparrow, Lancel, the Faith Militant, Margaery and Loras, Mace Tyrell, Kevan Lannister, and assorted towns folk. What is left to do but remove his crown and jump out the window?

When Qyburn presents his body to Cersei she doesn’t shed a tear.
“He belongs with my father and his brother and sister. Burn him and spread his ashes where the Sept once stood.” Cold as ice. All the humanity is gone from her. If you needed more proof you just needed the scene with Sept Unella to confirm it. She has her tied up and water boards her with wine (‘wine boarded?) asking her to ‘confess’. Cersei than gives her confession.

“Confess, it felt good,” she begins, “Beating me, starving me, frightening me, humiliating me. You didn’t do it because you cared about my atonement; you did it because it felt good. I understand. I do things because they feel good. I drink because it feels good. I killed my husband because it felt good to be rid of him. I fucked my brother, because it feels good to feel him inside of me. I lie about fucking my brother, because it feels good to keep our son safe from hateful hypocrites. I killed your High Sparrow, and all his little sparrows, all his septons and all his septas, all his filthy soldiers because it felt good to watch them burn. It felt good to imagine their shock and their pain. No thought has ever given me greater joy. Even confessing feels good under the right circumstances.”

Sept Unella thinks she is going to die quickly but Cersei assures her she won’t die ‘for quite some time’. Then The Mountain enters the room and removes his helmet. I imagined worse, sort of like when Darth Vader removed his helmet in Return Of The Jedi. “This is your god now”, Cersei tells her and then leaves the two of them alone. And as Sept Unella screams, Cersei keeps saying “Shame. Shame. Shame”, closed the door and shuts the window. Damn.

The Twins

Meanwhile, Walder Frey couldn’t be happier! Jamie has taken River Run and it is back in Frey’s hands. So they are having a feast which just reminded me of the last feast we saw at The Twins. Walder Frey even makes a toast in remembrance of that fateful feast, “The Lannisters and The Freys send their regards!” Bastard!!! Jamie loathes this guy, too. While Bronn goes off with two lovely ladies Jamie chats with Walder Frey and basically says ‘why do we need you if you have to call us every time you need something done?’

I was hoping Jamie would off the old man but someone much better is given the honor.
Later on when he is alone, a lovely maid is serving him his meal. He wonders where his sons are and the young lady tells him that they are here. What do you think is this meat pie I just served you! Then before you can say ‘Sweeny Todd’ the young woman peels off her face and reveals herself to be Arya Stark!

“My name is Arya Stark,” she calmly says. “I want you to know that. The last thing you’re ever going to see is a Stark smiling down at you as you die.”

Then she pulls a Sweeny Todd and slices his throat. She smirks at him while he bleeds out. How did she get back to Westeros so fast? Who cares? She did what needed to be done and she got to scratch a name off of her list.

The Citadel

Sam and Gilly arrive at The Citadel. Gilly looks lovelier and lovelier all the time. There seems to be some confusion at the front desk. They still show Joer Mormont as Lord Commander but while they sort it out Sam may have access to the library. It is a massive, impressive place. Sam is beside himself with joy at all the knowledge at his fingertips. Poor Gilly had to wait outside though. I’m Dany will change the rules once she is sitting on The Iron Throne, right?
Westeros

Davos confronts Melisandre in front of Jon. He tosses her the wooden stag he made for Shireen and forces her to confess that they burned her at the stake. “I loved that girl as if she was my own!”, Davos tells her and it broke my heart as well. Melisandre defends herself and tells them that Stannis and his wife also agreed to the poor girls’ sacrifice to The Lord of Light. It did no good of course, they all died anyway. Davos requests permission to execute her but Jon only banished her and tells her if she comes North again she will be executed. Davos tells he’s the one who will do it. Some will say Jon should have had her executed but she did bring him back to life so he had to give her a break here. I think Davos understood that.

Jon and Sansa have a moment on the ramparts of Winterfell. Jon tells her that she is the lady of Winterfell and gets the large bedroom. “We wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.” Jon says,“I’m not a Stark.”

“To me you are,” Sansa tells him and then apologizes for not telling him about Little Finger and The Army of The Vale. “Do you trust him?” Jon asks. “You can’t trust Little Finger.” She tells him. But they need to trust each other.
“We have so many enemies now.” Jon says and all seems right in the world.

“Jon, we received a white raven from The Citadel. Winter is here.”
“That’s what father always promised.”

Dorne

“Let the big women speak.” Lady Tyrell

Lady Tyrell meets with Elaria Sand and her Sand Snakes to form an alliance against Cersei and what’s left of The Lannisters. Lady Tyrell has lost everyone and as she says, this is not about the salvaging of her house. It’s all about revenge now. To that end, enter one Varys! Yes, a Martell –Tyrell –Targaryen alliance really stacks the deck, doesn’t it?

Mereen

“You have your armies, you have your ships, you have your dragons; everything you’ve ever wanted since you were old enough to want anything.” Tyrion Lannister to Daenerys

Daario tells Dany the ships are ready. Danys tells Daario you are staying behind.

“I can’t bring a lover to Westeros.”
“A king wouldn’t think twice about it.”
“You want to be my mistress?”

After she bids Daario farewell, Dany goes to speak with Tyrion.
“How did he take it?”
“No tears”
“He wasn’t the first to love you and he won’t be the last”
“You have completely failed to console me”

Of course it makes sense, she may need to make an alliance by marriage and it’s better not to bring any ‘baggage’ with her to Westeros. Tyrion swears allegiance to her in the sweetest way.

“I would pledge my sword but I don’t actually own a sword.”
“It’s your counsel I need.” Dany tells him and then brings out something she had made for him. She presents him with the Hand of The King brooch. “You are the Hand of The Queen”. He is speechless for once and simply kneels before his queen.

Winterfell

“Every time I’m faced with a decision I close my eyes and see the same picture. A picture of me, on the Iron Throne… and you by my side.” Lord Baelish to Sansa

Little Finger approaches Sansa and tells him the picture he has in his mind and then goes in for the kiss. Sansa puts up her hand and stops him but not forcefully, more like she isn’t ready to go there…..yet. “It’s a pretty picture.” She says and then walks away.
“You, my love, are the future of House Stark.” Little Finger says to her, putting all sorts of ideas in her head.

In the meeting of all the heads of the families of The North, they grumble about being associated with Wildlings. “We didn’t invade. We were invited”, Tormund tells them.
They think the war is over and want to go home and wait out the Winter. But Jon assures them the war is not over and there’s worse to come. This is when Lady Mormont, the breakout star of the Sixth Season stood up and blasted the old men in the room.

“Your son was butchered at the Red Wedding, Lord Manderlay. But you refused the call. You swore allegiance to House Stark, Lord Glover. But in their hour of greatest need, you refused the call. And you, Lord Kerwin, your father was skinned alive by Ramsay Bolton, still, you refused the call. But House Mormont remembers. The North remembers. We know no king but the King in the North whose name is Stark. I don’t care if he’s a bastard. Ned Stark’s blood runs through his veins. He’s my king, from this day until his last day!”

“Lady Mormont speaks harshly but truthfully” Lord Manderlay admits. And with that they all lift their swords and pledged allegiance to ‘The White Wolf” (where is Ghost?)!

“The King in The North! The King in The North!”

The last time we saw a similar scene things didn’t turn out so well. Jon, like Robb doesn’t really want to sit on The Iron Throne. Sansa sits besides him and smiles but then looks over at the brooding Little Finger and the smile leaves her face. The wheels are always turning in his head and now he has the wheels turning in Sansa’s head. That look of worry on Sansa’s face may be more about what she fears she is capable of. Robb ultimately did not listen to Catelyn’s advice and it got them all killed.

The Tower Of Joy

Uncle Benji drops Bran off as close to The Wall as he could. Bran then goes into a trance and returns to The Tower Of Joy, this time following his father Ned inside. It is as we expected. Lyanna is dying after giving birth to a son. She asks Ned to promise to look after him. If Robert finds out he would kill the baby. “Promise me, Ned.” As Ned holds the baby in his arms and we zoom in on his little face we cut to Jon Snow’s face. Do we find out definitively that Rhaegar is the father? No. But we’re 99% sure, aren’t we?

Jon is hailed as King in The North because Ned Stark’s blood runs through him but we now know it doesn’t. What will he do when he finds out? What will the Northerners do? What will Sansa do? Things are going to get real complicated real fast.

Before we go further let’s hear from Charlotte Radwell and her take on this weeks Westeros Fashion!

This episode really set the stage for next season, but for me it was all about Cersei’s badass Maleficent outfit. Every detail of it was perfectly fitted and villainous. The snakeskin texture of her dress, the crystal ring, the high collar, the way they made us wait to see the full body outfit… So dark in the best way. Then towards the end she caps on some metal shoulder pads and awe and admiration ensued (from only me probably).

Other people existed in this episode- Gilly is looking great, color has been restored to her face and she wore something other than dirty rags or a Medieval Times costume.

Daenerys wore two different cape dresses, proving she is a super-woman-hero like we already knew. I like that her last scene cape dress was off the shoulder, fully embracing this summer’s number one trend but bringing it up a notch since she owns dragons.

I tried really hard to pay attention to the happenings of this episode because it was the season finale and I still don’t know everyone’s names or their relevance, so to any great outfits I failed to write about- I’m sorry and I’m sure I’ll see you next season!

The episode ends with two of the most ominous scenes in the show’s history.

King’s Landing

Jamie arrives just in time to watch Cersei be crowned Queen of The Seven Kingdoms.
What must be going through his head? His son is dead. All three children with Cersei are dead. He had told Edmure Tully how much he admired Cersei for her love of her children. That love is gone. Perhaps all love is gone. What is left for him? What is his place in her regime? She has The Mountain. Is Jamie any use to her now?

As an aside folks, the dream of ‘Cleghane Bowl’ is still alive!

The final scene is a glorious one! Dany’s armada has set sail for Westeros. The Unsullied and The Dothraki, Yara, Theon and The iron Born army plus three dragons! The ships have dragon mastheads at dragons on it’s sails! And there is Dany with Tyrion, Varys (how did he get back so fast?) and Missandei by her side.

This is what we have all been waiting for and longing to see, right? In fact, Season Six has given us just about everything we have been wanting to see in healthy servings. Now comes the hard part. Soon many people we like will be fighting each other. Even though Dany seems to have overwhelming force on her side I just have a bad feeling that things will not go as planned. It’s just too obvious. What will Jon and Sansa do? Just sit in Winterfell and wait to see what happens? Sansa, under Little Finger’s machinations, may press him to attempt to take King’s Landing. To avenge their family’s murderers, The Lannisters. To take the Iron Throne. Then there are The White Walkers and their army of the dead.

Throw in Arya who is on a killing spree, The Hound and The Brotherhood Without Banners who’s plan is unknown and Brienne who we assume will return to Winterfell to serve Sansa and we have quite a stew stirring in the pot!

It’s been a great season!  On behalf of Charlotte and myself, thank you for following the recaps!

Until next year! Seven Greetings, Friends!

Wow! What more can you say? It was an episode filled with ‘Wow’ moments. I was so obsessed with The Bastard Bowl that I was surprised when the episode opened on the Siege Of Mereen! The show is wrapping up some unfinished business in these last two episodes and many are about to die. They didn’t hold back in this episode. It was as exciting and thrilling as any hour of television I’ve ever seen. Let’s dive in!

The Siege of Mereen

 “My reign has just begun.”  Daenerys

The Masters seem to have Dany and her city right where they want them. Hurling huge iron balls from their hundreds of ships to smash against the mighty pyramid. Inside Tyrion is on the hot seat with Dany.

 “Despite appearances, the city is on the rise?” He tells her.  Dany is not pleased.

“Shall we begin”, she tells him.

“You have a plan?”

Duh! She has three dragons!! They meet with the Masters to discuss terms of surrender. The Masters prattle on about how they’re going to put Missandei back in chains and kill her dragons. Are they stark raving mad!

 “We’re not here to discuss our terms of surrender.  We’re here to discuss yours.” Tyrion tells him. Then you hear that familiar sound. There be dragons here! Drogon swoops down and lands right next to Dany! “Hi Mom! Who are these bums?”

Dany mounts Drogon and flies off to attack the armada. Then we see the other two dragons burst out of their dungeon to join their mom and big brother. Drogon descends on one of the ships and Dany gives the command, “Dracarys!” That boat was toast!

On the ground, the Sons of the Harpy are slaughtering some unarmed, helpless people when they hear a loud sound.  The turn to see hundreds of Dothraki warriors with Daario in the lead, headed at them full steam! Daario slices off one of the masked men’s head. The Harpys are done!

“Thank you for the armada. Our queen loves ships!” Tyrion tells the three Masters who are now pissing their pants. He tells them that one of them must die for going back on the deal they agreed to with Tyrion. Immediately two of them point at their colleague in between them and say ‘kill him’. The poor guy drops to his knees as Gray Worm approached.  Gray Worm drew his sword and then sliced the throats of the two still standing. Tyrion then tells the third master to go back to his people and tell them what he say here today.

 Winterfell

“My dogs are desperate to meet you. I haven’t fed them in seven days, they’re ravenous.” Ramsey Bolton

Jon holds a parlay with Ramsey.  Sansa is by her side wearing a dress with the Stark logo splashed on the front. Tormund, Ser Davos and young Lady Mormont are also present. Ramsey leers at Sansa. “Thank you for bringing Lady Bolton safely. Now get off your horse and kneel before me.”

Jon has a proposition for him. “Thousands don’t need to die.  Only one of us.”

Mano a mano! Old school! But Ramsey isn’t having any of that! He’s heard the talk about Jon being a great swordsman. He knows his army is twice the size of Jon’s ragtag lot. Jon tries to get under his skin but he doesn’t know this guy. He likes ‘games’. He tells them that he still has their brother Rickon. He throws the head of Shaggydog before them as proof. At this point Sansa has heard enough.

“You’re going to die tomorrow, Lord Bolton. Sleep well.” And rides off. I love how those blue eyes just burn red with hate when she looks at Ramsey.

Later on at the war council meeting Ser Davos advises that they need to make Ramsey advance on them. They don’t have enough men to charge at them. “They have the numbers.  We must have the patience.” Ser Davos tells him. Tormund asks Jon, “Did you really think that cunt would fight you one on one?” “No,” Jon admits, “I wanted to make him angry. I want him to come at us full tilt.”

Tormund and Davos leave and what follows is one of the best acted scenes of the season and perhaps the best scene Sophie Turner and Kit Harrington have had in the show. Sansa is upset that Jon has not sought her advice.

“Making your plans on how to defeat a man you don’t know. I lived with him. I know the way his mind works. I know he likes to hurt people. Did it ever once occur to you that I might have some insight? You think he’s going to fall into your trap he won’t.”

“You’re right. Tell me then.”

“Don’t do what he wants you to do!”

“What do you think I’ve been doing all my life? Playing with broomsticks? (Nice shout out to Harry Potter there)

“I’ve defended the Wall from worse than Ramsey Bolton”

Then Jon asks Sansa how they would get Rickon back.

“We’ll never get [Rickon] back. Rickon is Ned Stark’s trueborn son… He won’t live long.”

Damn! Sansa doesn’t mince words!

“If Ramsey wins I’m not going to him alive.”

“I’ll protect you.” Jon tells her.

“No one can protect me. No one can protect anyone.” Sansa says and makes her exit.

Good day, sir!

Jon visits Melisandre and tells her “If I fall don’t bring me back.”

“I have to try.” She tells him. It’s not up to her it’s up to The Lord of Light.

“Maybe he brought you back to die again.” She muses.

“What kind of god would do that? Jon asks.

“The one we’ve got.”

Tormund and Ser Davos have a nice talk. Two warriors preparing for battle.  They both are out to avenge the men they loved. Stannis Baratheon and Mance Rayder. Tormund says he always gets drunk the night before a battle and asks Davos if he would like to join him for a bottle of sour goat’s milk. Davos graciously declines and says that his ritual is walking. He walks all night until he gets far enough away from camp to shit in peace.

“Happy shitting.” Tormund tells him.  But Davos does have somewhere in particular to walk to. He comes across the place where Shireen was burned alive. He looks down and finds the wooden stag he made for her and that she was clutching as she burned. He will need to avenge her death. All in due time.

Mereen

Theon and Yara turn up in Mereen. They offer their ships and ask Dany to support Yara’s claim to be the ruler of The Iron Islands. At first, Dany thinks it’s Theon claim. “What’s wrong with you?” she asks him.  “I am unfit” he tells her. “On that we can agree on” Tyrion chimes in.  Tyrion hasn’t forgotten that Theon teased him the last time they met.

Yara and Dany have a flirtatious exchange as they bond over both having fathers that made bad kings and done in by usurpers.

“And I imagine your offer is free of any marriage demands?” Daenerys jokes.

“I never demand, but I’m up for anything, really,” Yara says and Dany smiles. Is it getting hot in here?

Dany agrees to support her claim but she has a condition.

“No more raiding, stealing or raping.”

“That’s our way of life.” Yara tells her but in the end agrees.

Winterfell

The two armies face each other. This is Jon’s ‘Braveheart’ moment. “FREEDOM!”

There are several flayed men hung upside down and on fire on crosses. That is the Bolton logo so why not? Then Ramsey brings out a bound Rickon. He pulls out he knife and raises it above his head. But instead of killing Rickon he cuts him loose.

“Do you like games, little man?” he tells Rickon. He tells him to run to his brother and if he makes it he wins. But Ramsey’s part involves shooting arrows at him. Poor Rickon starts running.  Jon can’t help himself. He starts riding towards Rickon. NO! Didn’t you listen to Sansa? This is just playing into Ramsey’s plan. Jon and Rickon keep getting closer as arrow after arrow misses him. For a second it looks like they will be reunited but just as Jon gets to him an arrow goes right through his chest. Again, Sansa was right.

No Jon is out there all alone. Ramsey sends his cavalry. Jon draws his sword. Bloody hell! But just at the moment Bolton’s men reach Jon they are met by Jon’s cavalry.  They smash into each other forcefully. The battle is on! The battle is shot magnificently. I don’t know how they did it. The scene did take 25 days to film and they shot 86 hours of film to create the battle. It’s just crazy. Bodies flying everywhere, arrows hailing down all around, men taken out by charging horses. The choreography is amazing.

The bodies are piled up that men have to climb them like mountains. Some the bodies are dead, some are still alive. Ser Davos had stayed behind with the archers but then they eventually charge into the pile. Ramsey sends in the rest of his forces, the Umbers, the Karstarks. At one point Jon has fallen and starts getting trampled on, literally being buried alive under hundreds of panicked men.  He manages to get back to his feet but by this point they are surrounded.

The Bolton forces then fall into the old Roman formation – shields up making a wall and then advancing with soldiers stabbing the enemy with spears from behind the shields. Wun Wun tries to break through their ranks.  He picks up one guy and rips him in half! But still they cannot break through. Things look pretty grim. But just as I had hoped, the army of The Vale rides in! And I mean a lot of them! They just start pouring into the Bolton forces, ripping them apart. We see Sansa observing with a smile with Little Finger smirking alongside of her.

Ramsey looks sick to his stomach.  Jon sees him and starts chasing him with Wun Wun and Tormund following close behind.  Ramsey makes it back to Winterfell and thinks they’ll be safe inside but Wun Wun just starts banging down the gate.  By this time, Wun Wun has taken so many arrows and spears he looks like a giant pin cushion but he demolishes the gate and Jon’s forces stream in killing what remained of Ramsey’s men. Jon looks over at Wun Wun who is on his knees and dying and just then an arrow is hot into his eye and Wun Wun collapses. Guess who shot it? Fucking Ramsey! Jon picks up a shield and advances on Ramsey. Ramsey begins shooting arrows at Jon who defends each one with the shield. Tormund and the others are looking on and saying, “What the fuck!”

Jon finally reaches Ramsey and starts beating the crap out of him! Ramsey even smiles. He’s one sick puppy. Jon would have beaten him to death but then he looks up and sees Sansa. He stops. I think he knew she should have the honor.

Then we get the scene we have all been hoping for. This was on my list last week of things I wanted to see. Ramsey is tied up and sitting in a chair in the kennel.  Sansa is looking at him through the gate.

“Sansa. Hello Sansa.” The words dripping out of his mouth along with blood. Sansa tells him, “you will disappear, your name will disappear, your house will disappear”. Then Ramsey sees his hounds come out of their cages. “My hounds will not harm me.”

“You haven’t fed them in seven days.”

Then one of his beloved hounds leaps up on his lap and starts licking the blood off his face. “Stop! Stop!” Ramsey screams and then the dog takes a chunk of his face. The other dogs start ripping into Ramsey. Sansa starts to walk away but then stops and decides to keep watching. She then turns and walks away and we see a faint smile as she does. Sansa Stark has come a long way from that annoying young girl who wanted to marry a prince. And damn if she isn’t playing the hell out of this Game of Thrones!

Charlotte, I know muddy soldiers isn’t much of a fashion statement. What did you think of tonight’s episode?

So this action packed episode was definitely my favorite of this season. There were so many great Daenerys and Sansa outfits! I also really loved the battle scenes, aerial views of the battle scenes, and Ramsey Bolton finally getting killed with Sansa pushing the button. Those dogs were hungry and Ramsey was evil and delicious.

Daenerys had some truly sick looks last night. She really has accessorizing down, with her first winning look being completely head to toe- complicated braids, leather skirt cape thing, fitted burlap top, and gypsy belt. It sounds like an outfit an eccentric park sleeping nomad would wear but it looked so fierce. Then she transitioned into a grey draped gown, asymmetrical choker, and metallic belt and I like actually need to own everything happening there.

Missandei finally properly outfitted her leather crop top with a breezy turquoise maxi skirt, Sansa broke out her embroidered wolf stuff, and Ramsey Bolton and Jon Snow again wore fur blankets as clothes. I also really appreciated the fit of Yara Greyjoy’s leather pants.

This episode was awesome and I had trouble paying too much attention to the clothes because there was too much long anticipated retribution happening. Next week looks super Lannister-centric. Let’s get some embroidered jewel tone dresses happening! See you next week.

Three Things I Think I Know

1 Little Finger will expect to marry Sansa. I think she will agree. He came to the rescue and they’d all be dead if he hadn’t.

2 Cersei will use wildfire to destroy the High Sparrow and the Faith Militant.

3 Arya will show up at Winterfell at the very end of next week’s episode!

Three Things I Want To See

1 I want to see Margaery survive the finale.

2 Brienne running into The Hound.

3 Will we ever see what happened inside the Tower Of Joy!!!!!

My Favorite Quote

 “You’re going to die tomorrow, Lord Bolton. Sleep well.” Sansa Stark

 Who Will Die In The Season Finale?

I’m thinking Tommen, The High Sparrow, Septa Unella, Lancel and rest of the Faith Militant.

This was one helluva good episode, Kit Harrington and Sophie Turner deserve Emmy nominations as does the episode for it’s many excellent technical achievements. I can’t believe we’re down to one!

The chess pieces are still being moved into place. The Battle for River Run never takes place but Jamie and Brienne share some nice moments. Arya has a terrifying experience with the ‘Terminator’ version of The Waif and Cersei is screwed! The Hound gets back to doing what he does best: Killing people and having fun doing it. Let’s get started.

The Hound

Those poor four guys, having a laugh around the camp fire, sticking their fingers in each others arse were just no match for The Hound and his fury. Were they even with the Brotherhood Without Banners? It didn’t matter. Seeing The Hound come up on them in the background as they laughed was scary! The axe to the groin was painful!

Later on, he comes across the three men that approached Brother Ray’s camp including the man in the yellow cloak. All three were about to be hung by Berick Donderrion and his co-hort Thoros of Myr, and they both seemed happy to see the guy they once wanted dead. Beric was going to punish them for what they did but The Hound demanded that he be allowed to kill them. They offered him one but The Hound successfully negotiated for two. When one of the Brotherhood points his arrow at him The Hound had a nice rebuttal.

“Drop that arrow you fucking girl. Tougher girls than you have tried to kill me.”

The Hound wanted to hack those guys with his ax but Beric wouldn’t allow it. They were to be hung. “Can’t I just lop off a hand?” The Hound begged. Beric and Thoros ask The Hound to join them. It looks like he will but what will their next mission be?

King’s Landing

Lancel and some of his Faith Militant buddies come to The Red Keep to escort Cersei back to The High Sparrow. King Tommen allowed them entry. But Cersei had no intention of returning to prison cell. Lancel threatens violence if she does not come with them.

“I choose violence.” Cersei coolly states. When one of the faith Militant stooges sticks his fork-like weapon into the Mountain’s chest with zero effect the real violence began. The mountain ripped his head off! Lancel decided they came at a bad time and left a piss trail behind him as he and his men retreated.

Cersei and Maester Qyburn smirked proudly at this small victory but things took a turn for the worse when King Tommen made a royal decree outlawing Trial By Combat as an option for trials going forward. Tommen doesn’t even look at her as he left the throne room. Cersei is screwed! She is running out of options.

River Run

Cersei still has Jamie. And Jamie is desperate to end the siege at River Run and get back to her. Brienne and Pod arrive and Brienne makes Jamie a proposal. Allow her to enter the castle to try and convince The Blackfish to surrender the castle without bloodshed and Jamie will allow him and his men to go North to join Sansa. Jamie gives his word he would. Brienne then tries to return the sword Jamie gave her, Oathkeeper. She says she was given a mission and she achieved it by finding Sansa.

“It’s yours. It will always be yours.” Jamie tells her. Of course, in Brienne’s heart she heard him say, “I’m yours. I will always be yours.”

Brienne also warns him that if this doesn’t work and he attacks the castle she is bound by honor to fight for Sansa’s kin, meaning she would fight him personally. “Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.” Jamie tells her.

Brienne has no luck changing The Blackfish’s mind. He brushes her off at first, “I haven’t seen her (Sansa) since she was a child, I don’t know who wrote this letter and I don’t know you!”. Brienne convinces him to at least read Sansa’s letter and he immediately softens, “She’s just like her mother.” But in the end he will not surrender. “I don’t have enough men to help her retake Winterfell.”

Jamie has a back up plan, however. He has a chat with Edmure Tully. Here we see the old Jamie, the douche bag Jamie. Edmure asks him “Do you imagine yourself a good person? You understand, on some level, you’re an evil man.” Edmure’s right. Jamie can be nice, especially with Brienne and Tyrion but he really is an awful person. He tells Edmure he can reunite him with his son and wife if he plays along otherwise he will catapult all of them over the castle wall. The next thing you know Edmure is shouting at the castle gate to let him in. The Blackfish knows it’s a trap but Edmure is the proper Lord of the castle and The Blackfish is powerless as the Tully men let Edmure enter the castle. Once in he demands that everyone lay down their arms and lower the drawbridge, allowing Jamie and The Freys to take the castle. He also orders that The Blackfish be put in chains and handed over to the Freys. Edmure you tool!

The Blackfish gets Brienne and Pod away on a small boat and then unsheathes his sword.
“I haven’t has a proper sword fight in many years. I imagine I will make a damn fool of myself.” Then he goes off to his death. Jamie is standing on the castle ramparts when he spots Brienne and Pod slowly rowing away from the castle. Brienne looks back at him. Jamie waves goodbye and Brienne does the same. Will this be the last time they ever see each other. I think so.

Mereen

The city seems to have come back to life! The preachers of the Lord Of the Light are singing Dany’s praises and the people seem to be eating it up. Varys is off on a secret mission to Westeros to get ships, perhaps. Varys and Tyrion seem sad to say farewell. It was very sweet how close they have become. “I better take my leave. It’s not good to be seen with the most famous dwarf in the city.” As Varys walks away Tyrion called after him, “Varys! The most famous dwarf in the world!”

There is a sweet scene between Tyrion, Missandei and Grey Worm. Tyrion finally forces them to drink wine with him and to tell jokes. Missandei tells an awful joke to which Tyrion forces a laugh. I don’t care if she can’t tell a joke. She’s simply adorable. But the good cheer is interrupted when an armada of ships start attacking the city. It’s the Masters. Tyrion was wrong to make a deal with them as Grey Worm and Missandei warned him. Lucky for all of them, Drogon makes a landing on the pyramid and drops off one Daenerys Targaryen!

Bravos

The episode begins with Lady Crane giving her speech over the dead Joffrey only this time she added a little something. Just as Arya suggested, she added some anger and ends the speech seeking vengeance! The crowd loved it! Once she went backstage she found a near death Arya. She sews up her wounds and gives her some milk of the poppy. Lady Crane wants her to join their troupe. Arya seeks more adventure besides she couldn’t memorize all those lines.

Their warm and mother-daughter relationship is short lived however. The waif shows up and kills Lady Crane. Such a shame. Arya jumps out the window and so begins a terrifying chase sequence. The Waif runs fast! And every time Arya jumped or slide or rolled down a hundred stairs I winced. By the end, of course, her stitches had come undone and she was bleeding all over the place. She kept leaving a blood trail and I was screaming ‘Arya you’re smarter than this!” and I was right. Arya lead The Waif back to Arya’s hiding place. She pulled out Needle and put out the candle making the room pitch black dark.

Back at the House of Black and White, Jaqen sees a trail of blood and follows it to the Hall of faces. He sees the Waifs face on display, blood still flowing from her eyes and mouth. He turns to see Arya holding Needle. “Finally, a girl becomes No One.” He says.

“I’m not No One. I’m Arya Stark of Winterfell and I’m going home.” She tells him and takes her leave.

“Good day, sir!”

Jaqen actually gives a little smile. You have to respect that kid. She sure has gumption!

Charlotte, what did you think?

So I missed a lot of this episode because it was so violent I had my head turned away in intervals, but there were a couple notable getups among the faces being ripped off and (I’m guessing from what I could hear) guts being ripped out.

I was so happy to be back in Meereen among the blue and yellow ropey draped maxi dresses. I like to think that if I were somehow transported to Santorini this is how my friends and I would look. In my fantasy, however, everything is beachy and breezy and the city doesn’t go under siege by former slave owners.

Then we cut to Jaime who is currently tenting outside of River Run, where he truly proves himself to be the knight of trendsetting leather jackets. Remember last episode when he wore a moto styled leather trench? Well this episode’s jacket is all about the aureate clasps and tailoring. I want one. Unfortunately he eventually has to do a costume change (gotta overtake a castle) and dress up in his fancy beetle armor. Get that roly poly bug shell off Jaime and put on a new kind of leather jacket. I’m waiting!

Missandei is still rocking some weird trousers and Cersei refuses to change out of the same dress she’s been wearing for weeks. I don’t even know why I’m bringing that up but come on… Missandei could totally outfit those leather crop tops better and Cersei must have so many other amazing dresses!! Change it up ladies.

Finally, this isn’t a fashion related thing, but did anyone else notice how this episode turned into Assassin’s Creed when the Waif was chasing Aria through Bravos? Roof jumping, obstacles, cloaks, merchants… I’m a nerd. See you next week for the much anticipated *fingers crossed* defeat of Ramsey Bolton.

Three Things I Think I Know

1 I’m starting to think that Cleghane Bowl is not going to happen.

2 House Glover will join Jon and Sansa in battle against Ramsey Bolton

3 Cersei and Qyburn had a cryptic exchange – it may involve wildfire and we may have seen something happen in Bran’s vision from Episode 6 that foreshadows what may happen in the Season Finale. Namely, the wildfire the Mad King booby trapped the city with. Could be a hot time in King’s Landing.

Three Things I Want To See

1 Drogon needs to find his brothers and destroy the Masters armada!

2 The return of Lady Mormont! Just a little scene of her putting someone in their place will do.

3 Sansa put the knife to Ramsey. She deserves to be the one to kill him.

Most Fun Scene

Special shout out to Bronn and Pod! Brienne and Jamie weren’t the only old friends that were reunited last night! Bronn teased Pod like an older brother. Now if we could only get Tyrion and the three amigos would be complete!

Favorite Quote

“I’m not No One. I’m Arya Stark of Winterfell and I’m going home.” Arya Stark

Next To Die

Oh, I hope it’s Ramsey Bolton!!!!!

Next week we get The Battle Of the Bastards! Jon looks outnumbered. But The Army Of the Vale is on the way! I’m thinking this episode will just be about this battle. I’m very excited!

Welcome back The Hound! In the very first cold open of the series, we discover that The Hound, left for dead by Arya at the end of the Fourth Season is indeed alive and well! Apparently, a repentant Al Swearengen found The Hound in a putrid state and nursed him back to health! Yes, it was a quick hello and goodbye to Ian McShane of Deadwood fame, who does a one episode and done cameo. This is reminiscent of what LOST did in the Season Six episode ‘Across The Sea’ when they cast Allison Janney for a one episode cameo.

We find The Hound in a lovely green clearing with a bunch of happy, simple people building a temple. It was kind of a Game Of Thrones version of ‘Witness’ with The Hound as the Harrison Ford character. McShane’s character, Brother Ray is a man with a violent past who has changed his ways and become a septum. He wears the same necklace as the High Sparrow so he must belong to the Faith Of The Seven. He sees a lot of himself in The Hound and since he’s physically healed (he chops a lot of wood) he begins his spiritual healing.

“The gods are not done with you yet.” Brother Ray tells him.
“If the gods are real why haven’t they punished me?” The Hound asks.
“They have.” Brother Ray tells him.

Brother Ray gives a nice sermon, testifying about how he was such a bad man but he turned his life around. “It’s never too late to come back”, he says, looking directly at The Hound. Just then some riders come along, members of the Brotherhood Without Banners, followers of The Lord Of Light. Brother Ray offers them supper but they want more. Of course, while The Hound is out chopping wood, they return and slaughter the whole community.

When The Hound returns to the camp he finds them all dead and Brother Ray hanging from the rafters of the unfinished temple. He picks up his ax and wanders off. Will he be seeking revenge from The Brotherhood? Is there still a chance we will see Lady Stoneheart?

King’s Landing

“You deserve a good bashing!” Lady Olenna to Septa Unella

Lady Olenna had the best lines in this episode, no question. Margery is playing up the repentant woman with the High Sparrow. They have another heart to heart and HS even lectures her on her duty to have sex with her husband, the King. Tommen’s been talking to HS too and is none too pleased that since she got religion he ain’t getting any! But I’m also worried HS may be on to her game. He tells Margery that she must teach her grandmother the new ways and that he fears she’s in danger both spiritually and physically. Of course, Margery tells Lady Olenna to high tail it back to High Garden but Lady Olenna won’t have it and she’s about had it with Margery’s constant companion, Septa Unella! But Margery is adamant about her leaving King’s Landing and presses something in her hand, a note with a drawing of a rose, their family sigil. Lady Olenna agrees to leave and is relieved that her granddaughter has not become a religious nut.

Meanwhile Cersei pleads for Lady Olenna not to leave, that they need to stick together to fight HS and the Faith Militant. Lady Olenna tells Cersei that it’s all her fault that they’re in this position in the first place.

“I wonder if you’re the worst person I’ve ever met? She says to Cersei.
“You love your granddaughter and I love my son and that is all that is real to me.” Cersei says.

Lady Olenna reminds Cersei that she is all alone and surrounded by enemies and that she best get out of town while the getting is good.

“I’ll never leave my son.” Cersei says. She may have sealed her fate. She should have listened to the old gal.

“You’ve lost, Cersei. It’s the only joy I can find in all this misery.” Lady Olenna closes with and she is outta there!!

The Wall and The North

“SNOW” Wun Wun

Jon, Sansa and Ser Davos begin their Northern Tour to build up an army. They start with the Wildlings. They were fine with going to battle with the White Walkers and their wights but not so keen on going to war with the Ramsey and his massive army.
“He died for us. If we’re not willing to do the same then we’re cowards.” Tormund stands up for Jon. But it took the giant Wun Wun, to stand tallest and declare “SNOW” to convince the Wildling leaders to agree to be part of Jon’s army.

The next stop was Bear Island and House Mormont, Ser Jorah’s family. They are led by an adorable young lady who is as tough as nails and sharp! When Sansa tries to charm her by saying she was named after Sansa’s Aunt Lyanna, Lady Lyanna Mormont shoots back, “Who am I addressing? A Lannister? Or a Bolton? I get conflicting reports.”
“I did what I had to in order to survive but I’m a Stark. I’ll always be a Stark.” Sansa responds

But it takes that old rascal, The Onion Knight himself, to woo the young Lady Mormont.
She agrees to stand with the Starks once again. But Jon and Sansa are disappointed to learn they can only offer 62 fighting men.

“If they fight half as ferociously as their lady, the Boltons are doomed.” Ser Davos says. He does have a way with the ladies.

Their next stop on the tour did not go as well. House Glover is still sore about Robb Stark marrying a “foreign whore” and getting everyone who followed him killed. Come on! That’s so third season!

Jon has made camp at the same spot old Stannis did when he was planning his ill fated assault on Winterfell. They got 2000 Wildlings, 62 Mormonts, and a couple hundred more from other Northern families. Jon is all for attacking Winterfell with ‘the army we have’ (very Donald Rumsfield of him) but Sansa says they need more men. I agree. So she gets an idea. She writes a letter and sends a raven. It looks like she’s going to need Little Finger and the Army of The Vale after all.

The Iron Born Twins

“I know you’ve had some bad years.” Yara with a straight face to Theon who does a spit take.

Yara and Theon take a pause in their journey for a little R & R at a seaside bordello. Poor Theon is surrounded by naked, beautiful women and is probably having a phantom hard on. Yara, meanwhile has her face planted in a lovely bosom and tells Theon to have a drink at least. In all seriousness, Yara, needs Theon to be Theon once again. She says if he wants to end it then open his wrists but if he’s staying he needs to find the Theon of old.

“We’re going to sail to Mereen, make a pact with this Dragon Queen and then we’re going to take back The Iron Islands“, she tells him. Drink up, Theon! Maybe Yara will let you watch.

River Run

“Good thing we’re friends or we’d be fucking you in the ass right now.” Bronn to the idiot Frey brothers.

Jamie leads his army of eight thousand to River Run to help take it back from The Blackfish, Brynden Tully. Of course, he has Bronn by his side. Jamie and Bronn have a sweet bromance going on. The Frey boys threaten to cut Edmure Tullys throat if The Blackfish doesn’t yield River Run. The Blackfish stands, stone faced from the castle wall and says, “Go on, do it then”, and walks away. Just a bluff. They don’t kill Edmure. Jamie witnesses this incompetence and tells them he will take over the siege and to bathe and feed their prisoner. Bronn arranges a parlay between The Blackfish and Jamie. Jamie promises not kill his men if he gives up River Run but he has broken his promises before. Jamie tries to tell him the war is over and this is all nonsense.

“As long as I’m standing the war is not over. Either attack or starve us out. We have provisions for two years. Do you have two years? The Blackfish is not budging. A battle is brewing.

I was hoping to see Brienne and Jamie be reunited but it looks like that’s going to happen next week. They’re going to be on opposite sides of this River Run thing.

Bravos

Arya makes arrangements to sail back to Westeros. She’s wearing her hair like her father now. A sure sign that she does have a name and it’s Stark. As she walks along a bridge and looks out at the statue of the Titan of Bravos, a sweet old lady approaches her. Who’s this? Then one of my friends yelled “It’s The Waif!” and sure enough this old lady starts stabbing Arya! NO!!! The bloody Waif! It was like a horror movie! Somehow Arya head butts her and gets away, jumping off the bridge into the river. The Waif seems satisfied that she’s done her duty. Arya comes up and walks ashore, badly bleeding from the knife wounds in her stomach.

Well, she had to know they come for her. And they could be anyone! Will she make it to morning? She will seek out Lady Crane. They will smuggle her out with the acting troupe as I’ve always suspected.

Charlotte, what are your takeaways from Episode Seven?

Hey guys! So we started off this episode by learning that- hallelujah- the Hound is alive. That bearded muppet is now building stuff for Father Yod in a sustainable commune, where unnecessarily belted tunics run rampant, and everyone wears brown because they know they’re going to get dirty anyway. Oh, the Hound, nothing expresses how hard you are to kill like a seersucker shirt and a vest. You will survive the Jonestown massacre though, so well played, the Hound.

Also, can we talk about Margery’s hair? Gorgeous! If you’re not having marital relations with your 14 year old husband, you should have time to consider a side part. Just saying.

Moving on to the Wildlings, my favorite NHL playoff team, I’m excited by the concept of using oyster shells and rat tails as armor but I mostly hope they choose the giant as their goalie. Anyone else notice there are no female giants? How does this genetic anomaly continue?

Back in Winterfell Jon Snow is still killing it with the man bun, thank goodness, and Sansa is rocking a pelt worthy of a Bergdorf window display. Love those two. Still though, no winter hats. Winterfell looks cold! Get some pelts on your heads!!

I leave you with the unfortunate vision of the Waif being every girl I hated in high school. They were way better at soccer than I ever was and I am so grateful they weren’t allowed to stab me in the stomach and push me over a bridge. Seriously though, why does the Waif look like my high school rivals?

Thanks, Charlotte!

Three Things I Think I Know:

1 Jamie and Brienne will make an alliance with The Blackfish and against Walder Frey.
2 Tyrion needs to deal with those two dragons he let loose on the playground.
3 Arya will be looking over her shoulder for the rest of her life.

Three Things I Want To See:

1 The Mountain let loose! Let’s see what he can do!
2 Walder Frey die! How long do we have to wait?
3 Rickon. Bring me the body of Rickon Stark!!

My Favorite Quote:

“You deserve a good bashing!” Lady Olenna, of course!

Who Is Next To die?

Based on the preview, I’m think Cersei’s kissin’ cousin, Lancel.

Things are ramping up, people. Three episodes left! I can’t believe it! So much to do still! And it looks like they’re breaking up the next two seasons into seven episodes each. Enjoy them while you can!